How do you entertain baby and toddler Twins?

I had so many people ask me how I was going to keep my Twins entertained once they were able to roll and crawl around. I pondered that thought many times. The solution actually came to me through the evolution of my Twins toy collection. It is hard not to find cool baby and toddler toys. The possibilities are endless. Hundreds of companies all over the world make hundreds of really cool toys. What's not to love about all that cuteness? I ended up getting some superyard and realized that the standard 6 panels it came with were just not creating nearly enough room for my Twins to play within. So I bought the 2 panel extension. I thought that would do the trick but I felt like that was a big joke. So I bought another 6 panels. It was nice for about 5 minutes. I was always buying toys, holidays and birthdays would go by, etc. When you have Twins you end up buying twice the stuff in most cases. When your Twins have a birthday, you don't just buy one of them a toy.  You buy them each a few things.  If your singleton child has a birthday you don't buy them half of a toy, so why would you not treat both of your Twins as equals and buy them say 5 toys each for their birthday for example. So then you have 10 new toys in the house. If you love buying them cute new toys and use your extra spending money on buying more toys for your Twins, then you end up with 2 more toys here and two more toys there.... etc. Same goes for buying outdoor toys for birthdays, holidays, or just for no occasion at all. Well pretty soon you might end up with a whole lot of toys.  I kept having to buy more superyard to accomodate the toys.  I started out wanting to keep my premature Twins in a safe semi-sterile environment. I have older kids and pets. I wanted to make sure the pets did not go near my Twins or their toys. I also wanted to make sure my Twins never somehow got hold of some random thing my older kids left laying around or dropped. You would be amazed at how many small items that older kids have in their pockets and backpacks. Candy, eraser caps for pencils, pencils, stickers, legos, silly bands bracelets, bits of paper that came out of their homework folder and fell on to the floor, a gummy bear that fell out of their hand, . there is an endless list.  Now we all, including my older kids to keep an eye out for anything they might have accidentally left in reach of the Twins, but all it takes is a second for a child to choke.. Imagine if suddenly your 11 year old walks by and a gummy bear falls from their hand or pocket.  You are changing one Twins diaper as the other one crawls around on the living room floor right near you.....suddenly you notice they are choking...... I never wanted to be left in that sort of scenario.  I wanted us to be able to keep the Twins safe, happy, entertained, etc. Plus I wanted to be able to go pee in peace.  How could i trust that my Twins were not doing something to put themselves in harms way if I was in the bathroom for 3 minutes? You can babyproof  your entire house until you are all babyproofed out and still something could happen.  The superyard and the toys together allowed me to create a Twin play area that was fun, safe, comfy, and could accommodate us to go in there and play with them as well as go to the kitchen to make lunch or have a quick pee break in the bathroom. .  I swear by the superyard. It is the only way to stay sane, keep your Twins safe from harms way and common accidents in the home as well as keep the toys all in one neat spot. Ours became pretty large and eventually took over the whole entire living room. We just don't have an extra room for a play room though. Plus it works out better for us to have their play area in the living room. Anyhow without further ado...these are random out of chronological order photos that show my Twins indoor play area. These days the superyard is outside serving a new purpose and doorway gates are in place. They have the living room and dining room to get crazy and have a blast with their toys. I just always enlarged the play area as they grew. I also added and changed around the toys a lot too. 

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Attn: Mom, We are Big Boys now!!

My Twins will be three years old in April. The almost three year olds in them is really shining through lately.
I have noticed they are really on top of talking in full sentences, changing their preferences, & exerting their independence. They have been using phrases lately that show they are making changes and growing up some.
It is pretty strange seeing them turn into three year olds. I have three "singleton" children who are much older (almost 15, almost 11, and almost 13), and they were much different when they were two-going-on-three.

I know a kid is a kid. and all kids develop differently but I feel like things are much different with Graham and Parker than they were with my older three kids.I don't even know how to explain it. I think it is just that everything they are doing is amplified by 2.

My oldest daughter was 2 and a half when my second child was born. My second child is only 15 months older than my third child. So I have experienced having a baby and a two year old toddler. I have also experienced having a not quite one and a half year old and a baby. Both of these age groups together had challenges. Once my third child was born I had a newborn, a fifteen month old and a nearly four year old.

One of the most common phrases that a mother of Twins hears from another mother is a combination of one of these phrases.....

• I have a baby and a toddler.... I know what it is like to have Twins.
• I have a baby and a toddler.....It's harder than having Twins.
• I have more than two children under age 4, that is much harder than Twins
• I have more than two children under age four, that is just like having Twins or even Triplets.

Some combination of those phrases have been heard by most mothers of Twins. I know I have heard them on more than one Occasion. I know that most of  the mothers who are saying them usually do not try to start an argument or make light of the challenges they face as opposed to yours, but sometimes they do.

I enjoy cutting in on facebook posts that a Twin Mom is kind of in a light hearted debate with a Singleton Mom who is trying to make her believe that her job as a Mother of a baby and a toddler is so much harder than having Twins. I really enjoy cutting in and saying  "HA...you are wrong!!!  I have had a baby and a toddler TWICE and one of those times it included a PRESCHOOLER!! I have Twins now and IT IS VERY different than having a baby and a toddler. So TRY proving your case now!!!!"   It usually makes the other Twin Mom quite happy that I ended her argument for her with proven evidence that the Singleton Mom is dead wrong. I speak the truth though. I have been there and done that and lived it.

So, anyhow I have thought lately how having Twins who are almost three years old is much different than having my older three so close in age. I do think some aspects of parenting Twins at age three are a little easier than some other stages. One positive note is that they can both walk. I can walk with them and hold their hands. They can now tell me if they want or need something. Sometimes they can tell me what is wrong if they are not feeling well. They really enjoy being more independent. They keep asking me if they can use the toilet. I am not really trying to potty train right now, but when we are at home they often go and use the toilet.

They listen better at this age, and they are really getting to be great with the alphabet, numbers, some signing, speaking in sentences, mimicking, pretend play,  sharing, using manners, helping to clean up their toys, and many other little things.

The downfall to them becoming so independent is that I have to really make sure I am well rested and full of energy to keep up with them. They like to be a little more independent than they can handle at times. They get somewhat frustrated about not being able to walk with me through a parking lot without holding my hand. It is hard for them to understand that if we are walking through the park or from the car to the door is different than in a parking lot.  One of my Twins is really not mature enough to walk along with me without holding my hand but in certain places, I let them both. Usually it is just Graham who gets to walk with me without holding my hand. Parker tries to run off sometimes because he thinks it is fun to decided that suddenly I need to chase him.  He had two brain bleeds in the NICU at birth and a tonic clonic/grand mal seizure at almost age two. So he is maturing at a slightly slower rate than his Twin. 

They are very busy and like to be doing something engaging at all times. They enjoy playing independently and with each other but often want me or Dad, or an older sibling to be playing along too. They enjoy certain activities with certain family members. I take them to playdates usually five days a week. They are really enjoying making friends. They are getting really acquainted with their playgroup friends and talk about them a lot at home. They talk about going to playdates and asking about when they will see their friends next. They know some of their playmates Mommys by name. They are really enjoying the activities we do. They love to be busy. They still nap 3-4 hours once a day so it is really nice to get that break. They can really wear you out!!

It's a wild ride but I would not trade having Twins for anything!

I am in the process of planning their birthday party right now. Many decisions to make and then I have to get the invitations out!  I think it will be a lot of fun for them this year. They are always talking about party hats, birthday partys, and singing the happy birthday song!!

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Boundaries

Sometimes I'm a really slow learner... It has taken way to long for me to figure out how to get Avery to willingly go into her gymnastics class.

Last semester I did everything I knew to do to get her to go in. I tried EVERY. SINGLE. WEEK. Emerson would run into class like it was the funnest thing in the world. She loved it. Every week I kept thinking Avery would see how much fun her sister was having and want to join in. Nope. This class is the 3 yr old class where they go in and the parents wait outside. Every week Emerson would run in and Avery would say she did not want to go and she would wait outside with me. For a while there I thought it was that she just wanted some alone time. Nope.

This semester started a few weeks ago and the first class neither of them wanted to go in. I thought I was gonna go bananas. Then the following week Emerson was back to going in happily and Avery was back to refusing to go. Last week I even resorted to just putting her into the class and walking away. About half way into the class I looked in and she was still lying in the same place still upset. BAD MOMMY!!! I felt horrible. The only reason I even tried this is that she had went into the YMCA play area so willingly and had not cried.

Last Thursday she was watching a Sesame Street and there were gymnast doing flips and cool stuff. Avery yelled, "I wanna do that!" I said, "well honey, to do that you have to actually go into gymnastics class." Then they had a birthday party Saturday that was at the Y and they did gymnastics. When we all went into the gymnastics area she was happily with the class then she ran over and sat by me. I reminded her of the gymnasts on TV and she ran back to the circle to participate. After the party I took them to Target to buy leotards for class. As I was talking to them about the leotards and gymnastics I asked Avery if she would go into class this coming week and she said, "Yes." Cut to today....

I tell them what we are doing today, "going to gymnastics." and immediately Avery tells me she doesn't want to go. I get out the leotards and get them dressed and she is still telling me she doesn't want to go. We get there and she tells me she wants to stay outside with me. Suddenly it dawns on me, "Avery, if I tell the teachers not to touch you without your permission will you go into class?" "YES!" She ran in like a flash never looking back. I grabbed a teacher and reminded her that Avery does not like to be touched, so please ask her before touching her.

The teachers were AWESOME! One of them said she kept telling Avery, "Don't touch me!!! Don't you touch me" and Avery would laugh.

I know she just needs to feel like she trusts you before you can touch her. I don't think it's that much to ask. How would you like it if someone picked you up and moved you without saying a word?

I started really noticing this when we were going to the toddler transitional gymnastics classes. It is a little more structured then the tot/mom gymnastics, but mom is still there to help. Whenever the instructor would tell Avery what to do and then try to spot her Avery would say, "NO, I do it." Then if she needed help she would say, "NO, Mama help me." and I would spot her. Then one day at this same class I was on the other side of the room and Avery had picked up a toy the teacher wanted to put up. Instead of taking the toy from Avery she picked Avery up and carried her across the room to put the toy away. Avery FREAKED she was crying and I could see she was VERY upset, and it had nothing to do with the toy she was carrying. I was trying to tell the teacher that Avery was freaking out about her holding her not the toy, but I was across the room and she was not paying attention. After she put Avery down she ran to me and was in desperate need of recovery. I had to hold her for what seemed like forever for her to feel ok again.

So why did I not put the two together before? She assumed that if I was not going to be in there the teachers were going to grab at her willy nilly....

Yes, she will eventually need to be touched by the gym couches if she is going to learn to do any of the gymnastics, but they can at least ask first!

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